The Case for Mark Letestu

The Penguins are in need of a serviceable third center and I strongly believe there’s no better option than Mark Letestu. By the end of this post you will also think this. I promise.

For the following tables I’ll be looking at our team’s players from last year, and included Letestu to see where he ranks up. I won’t be looking at any players who came up for a handful of games (Dea, Rowney) for the sake of skipping out on a 100% faceoff win percentage because of 1 GP.

 

Some Stats: A Science Journal

Let’s first take a look at the Penguin’s face-off win percentage from 2016-17.

Player FO%
Cullen 51.2%
Letestu 50.4%
Crosby 48.2%
Bonino 48.0%
Malkin 43.1%

Letestu is looking hot from the start, albeit this is a cherry-picked stat to begin with. Then again, Cullen, a man 8 years Letestu’s senior is beating him pretty well in FO%, so let’s take into account TOI.

 

Player TOI
Crosby 19.53
Malkin 18:37
Bonino 16:39
Letestu 14:14
Cullen 13:55

Letestu isn’t looking so hot now, actually. For being 40 years old Cullen is an absolute workhorse. Letestu barely gets more TOI/G, not a great look.

 

Here’s something that actually matters: points!

Player GP G A P
Crosby 75 44 45 89
Malkin 62 33 39 72
Bonino 80 18 19 37
Letestu 78 15 19 35
Cullen 72 13 18 31

In two less games Letestu has two less points. That’s a suitable replacement if you ask me, especially considering Letestu plays on the Edmonton Oilers, where he’s on the fourth line with Kassian and “Slepyshev”, not Phil Kessel.

With all the coaching changes that have happened over the summer, something we might want to forecast is how the powerplay unit will be functioning.

How does Science fair (heh heh) when it comes to powerplay?

Player PPG PPP
Kessel 8 30
Crosby 14 25
Malkin 11 23
Hornqvist 10 17
Letestu 11 14
Bonino 6 11
Cullen 2 4

Woah. Let’s not ignore this one.

Letestu has been lighting it up on the powerplay, he has as many goals as Malkin. See:

“People start asking me ‘How is a fourth line centre doing it?’”

The answer, Letestu said, is simple. He is paid to pull the trigger, which is surprising in its own right considering his shot isn’t the most accurate or the hardest

He likes to pull the trigger on the powerplay.

Yinzers.

Will.

Love.

Him.

“Sure, but does he show up in the playoffs?”

Are you kidding me?! Sign me up right now! THIRD in the league in playoff PPG.

 

Leadership: Put to the Test (Tube)

Letestu is loved by Edmonton fans, there’s no tube ways about it, no rift in the fanbase as we saw with Hunwick.

I’ll spare you a slew of screenshots and just say that you can look anywhere on reddit and see users singing his praises as being well-spoken and an educated leader. CFA 2.0, anyone?

 

 

Salary: Time to Blind You With Science.

Now, the kicker: Salary

There’s no point to look at Crosby and Malkin here, so I’m keeping it short and sweet. The big loss is Bonino, and this should make you feel much better about it.

Player Salary/year
Bonino 1.9m (now 4.1)
Letestu 1.8m
Cullen 1m

Bonino at 4.1 seems batshit crazy to me, especially when Letestu is at 1.8 right now. Letestu is an absolute steal, even with a slight pay upgrade.

 

 

The Verdict?

Trade everyone for Letestu. We need Letestu.

  • j-b0t

    I’m on board with Letestu. It’s madness that Bonino got 4.1. Once again most teams and GMs proving they don’t have any clue wtf they’re doing.

    • Rad88

      Gotta say, when I first saw the post I thought “Brendan has had a testtube boner since the first time I talked to him” but this is actually well done and makes great points. I was thinking it would be a parody post but now I’m sitting here nodding my head in agreement. Well Done B

      • Jovi

        Sheep.

        • SouthSideGeno

          That’s Dr. Sheep to you missy ; )

  • SouthSideGeno

    Well…fuk, I never wanted to get rid of him in the first place.
    Hope GMJR reads this and get’s him back.

    Give yerself a raise…nice post Bren

    • Penguin in Houston

      Would definitely welcome back Test Tube!

      • SouthSideGeno

        Did you have a fun burfday Tex?

        • Penguin in Houston

          It was fun. Then, yesterday, I went to my sister’s house and celebrated with her, bro in law, and niece and nephews. Today is the boyfriend’s birthday. So, more celebrating tonight!

  • Jovi

    read the title and burst into laughter.

    • Jovi

      The Pens really do love bringing back there old flames. Fleury will be back in another 5 yrs.

  • Usedtohaveaname

    No thank you.

    • SouthSideGeno

      But think of all the great French test tube jokes we could make…oh shit…I think I just used them all up.

  • PensPointsYourMom

    ahhh shit! I had the opportunity to buy a game used Letestu stick right after he was traded for cheap. I laughed about it when I saw it in the PensGear store.

    I don’t mind a Letestu trade, but the one thing missing is that he’s a UFA after this season. He’ll probably pull in Bonino type money next season. Money the pens probably won’t pay. So he’s a rental. That’s ok, but if GMJR is gonna go out and get him, he better pay rental prices, i.e. a third or less. I don’t see the Oilers letting their “power play specialist” go for the price he’s worth.

    • Midnight Rider

      I suppose I could live with Letestu as the 4C, but he is no 3C. 14 of his 35 points were on Edmonton’s first powerplay unit. Cardboard Orpik could get at least 20.

      Bonino and Cullen got little to no first powerplay time, which is what the Pens need to replace. Sorry, Brendino.

      • Midnight Rider

        *WWW.sorry.blawgczar

        • Jovi

          WWWW.sorry.blawgczar

          Fixed.

      • This is a good point, look for a rebuttal to it in Part Tube and Three

        • Ungaba

          THIS ISN’T HAPPENING BECAUSE HE ISN’T COMING HERE.

  • Andy PepPep

    Yes, but can he fight?

    • SouthSideGeno

      Hecks yeah…he beat the uterus outta Ung’s mum last night.

  • lauriruu

    Shall we begin?

    • SouthSideGeno

      poop…books…slop….poop….books…slop…poop…books…slop

      Shall I continue?
      hahaha

      • lauriruu

        Hahaaa! That shit was funny. Such a divergence from the ‘norm’ of GoT.

        • SouthSideGeno

          The episode’s title was a lil misleading…thought it would have dealt moar with DRAGONS.
          But I’m good…they’re coming.

          • lauriruu

            There were dragons, there were stone. Can’t complain.

          • Ungaba

            A dragon coming. Imagine. It would be BUCKETS. Ugh.

      • lauriruu

        I hope you weren’t eating pudding or pocket warm candy bars during that scene.

        • SouthSideGeno

          I was having a big bowl of chipped beef & barley stew….mmmmmm

      • NO SPOILERS

        • SouthSideGeno

          ooops…sawwry

      • Ungaba

        You forgot the occasional ‘hooooork’!!!

      • Penguin in Houston

        Wouldn’t want to sit next to you on a plane.

        • SouthSideGeno

          Mile High Club Honors though???

  • SouthSideGeno

    Just about ready to lift off from JFK…see ya in 6 hours : (

  • MoonStanley
    • Ungaba

      WV is one of the purtiest states to drive through. Have fun, bro!

      • MoonStanley

        Thank you! I am liking it more and more

    • PensPointsYourMom

      stop at the New River Gorge overlook!

      • Ungaba

        I think that’s the opposite direction for him. We stopped there on the way to Kiawah Island, but Slothman is headed West.

        GO WEST, YOUNG MAN!!!

        • PensPointsYourMom

          nah, that’s US 19 about 10 miles north of Summersville WV. I used to drive that road 6 or 8 times a year.

          • Ungaba

            Well la-di-da, Mr. I Know All The Roads Of West Virginia Fancy-Pants!

          • PensPointsYourMom

            put your Congaba back in your pants and relax.

          • Ungaba

            It’s only been out once today, though. And if I get it out more, I WILL relax!

          • PensPointsYourMom

            Beat the grass to startle the snakes…

          • Ungaba

            Distributin’ free literature…

      • MoonStanley

        Bluestone River Overlook. I may have passed New River, but I’ve been stopping at every overlook I see. I think I saw signs for it

        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a17b966af8b12ba0859d509342573c1d3c2e9732e0bb2f3f214c63aab84a3d93.jpg

        • SouthSideGeno

          Blue Ridge Mountains?

          • PensPointsYourMom

            southern WV

          • SouthSideGeno

            Lot’s of wombats?

      • Penguin in Houston

        I whitewater rafted that river. It was crazy fast, not the Gauley but still…

        • PensPointsYourMom

          weeeeeeeeeeeee….

    • Penguin in Houston

      WV is pretty.

  • Ungaba

    Not to rain on this scientific parade, but why would Edmonton WANT to trade LeTestTube? He fits their needs and has been there awhile (long enough to be a ‘veteran presence’ in the locker room). He’s from Alberta. The team made the second round last year, partly because of him. Sure, Juicy is able to play center, but isn’t he a better winger anyway? I believe so.

    I think it would take too much to get him, especially since the Oil likely believe they should AT LEAST make the Conference Finals this year. You don’t get rid of quality assets, especially ones that are cheap, when you’re on the cusp like they are.

    • PensPointsYourMom

      agree. He’s worth more to them than a mid-pick, which is what he should be worth to us. He fits the need we have, but the price isn’t right.

    • Some guy(s) on reddit made a good point(s)

      “Your post confuses me – you give him credit for his production, but then immediately after it point out that it’s almost entirely a function of playing on the PP and don’t mention a thing about that. He had 1.33 P/60 at 5 on 5 last year (that would be the worst among Penguins forwards not named Josh Archibald) while playing on and getting 4th line match ups – asking him to step up in the line-up likely brings tougher competition and would hurt that production even more.
      This guy’s been a possession black-hole for the last five years (48.1% FF% is his best zone-adjusted mark in the last 5 years) and the only potential value he would add is being a PP trigger man, which the team doesn’t have a need for. Not to mention the assets you’d have to give up to get him out of Edmonton – /u/moorese7encorrectly points out that Edmonton needs him and as a team that’s trying to win now they aren’t going to be apt to weaken their team. A Letestu add makes no sense to me.”

      Moore’s comment:
      “And Edmonton will replace Mark Letestu with…?
      They have the same problem as us, considering Leon Draisaitl is playing RW. Past Connor McDavid and Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, the center depth is lacking.”

      • PensPointsYourMom

        they do have Juice now though. Not saying that means they’ll move the tube, just that they have 3 legit centers.

        • Yeah, my research last night was more “what if we DID get him” and less “what would we trade for him”, good to know this is something people would want to read about in the future, for say… jagr

          • Penguin in Houston

            #jagrwatchcontinues

          • PensPointsYourMom

            pens won’t sign jagr…sorry to be the one to say it/poopy pants.

          • Randy

            Why? Coz he doesn’t want bottom six minutes like Kuni? If we could somehow land Marchessault (totes rental) we’d have the beginnings of an FLA line. JR likes a good bargain, but LVK caused a rift in the talent pool. I think they have 8C.

        • Penguin in Houston

          Remember when we had Juice? WE didn’t go anywhere.

    • Penguin in Houston

      Butt, Edmonton can be pretty dumb. So, there’s that.

  • Jovi

    All is quiet on the Western front.

  • lauriruu

    He looks THRILLED

  • Penguin in Houston

    There’s never anything nice about the Soup Can.

  • Normally @lauriruu:disqus gives his TWO cents but lately it’s just been 1. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a415026062520ce6ef7f0a02af8315732dfa3344ae2654f547c9bd57413945a6.png

    • The66thDopefish

      The economy has been hard even for countries with high GINI indices.

    • lauriruu

      Maybe I should start posting stoopid gifs 🙂

    • Randy

      Frk I should start clicking ads more. Gotta represent. This is looking like the summer Olympics.

    • Ungaba

      Took me a while to figure out what the hell you were talking about.

      I guess I should click an ad once in a while, eh?

  • The66thDopefish

    This is the most mesmerizing gif I’ve seen today thus far: https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/anrpqu3ypatkz8f35jjr.gif

    • Ungaba

      That shithead should have at least TRIED to hit it if he knew it would have that stuff in it. Dumbass.

      • UlfSammySon

        Sttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerike!

      • The66thDopefish

        This whole thing is a failure. He’s standing 90 degrees in the wrong orientation, her underhand toss would’ve handcuffed him if he had swung at it, and there’s perfectly fine empty street in the background that apparently no one thought to do this in.

  • Ungaba
    • UlfSammySon

      I have yet to watch a single episode of this. I know I’m gonna love it, but the commitment is so great now to catch up…

      • I found the first few seasons incredibly boring. Instead of using the magic of television to depict stories they rely on old women talking to each other about the past, and every now and again throw a boob or some blood in to keep you engaged

        • UlfSammySon

          Hm… old women you say??

        • Ungaba

          Dude, boobs were WAYYYYYYY more than ‘every now and again’.

          Also, you’re tarded. The show is great, from start to finish.

          • The past season has been good because they actually show stories unfolding in the past instead of relying on characters talking for 5-6 minutes “my father… he was a warrior” they actually now SHOW a guy who was a warrior, while a voiceover plays. It’s much better, but everything prior to this season has just been people telling stories

          • SouthSideGeno

            Dude…just, NO

          • Randy

            Is it Breaking Bad good?

          • lauriruu

            Better!

          • It’s the best show of all time, hands down

          • Andy PepPep

            …..true

          • SouthSideGeno

            Easily….100% YES

        • Randy

          Boobs and blood is my fav. combination.

          I’m watching Narcos right now and it’s so annoying how every episode has a Godfather like climactic ending. Usually Escobar dancing with his wife with soff music in the background while it cuts to violent scenes. Straight up copying the Godfather films.

          • I’ve never seen the godfather films so I loved Narcos

          • Ungaba

            First of all, you need to change this immediately. Go watch Godfather I and II ASAP. 3 is optional, but also good.

            DO IT.

          • Randy

            Agreed, they are the 1984 and Brave New World of cinema.

          • SouthSideGeno

            Bren & Jovi….why am I not surprised…face palm

          • Jovi

            I’ve never seen Godfather either. I keep thinking, next tv marathon, I’ll watch it. Usually they show the marathons during Christmas. Not really in the mood to watch it then; too busy watching DIe Hard.

          • lauriruu

            Yes. Each of the three Die Hard films are great.

            Watch Godfather 🙂 It’s well worth it.

          • SouthSideGeno

            YOU ARE UN-ITALIAN AMERICAN…I’m revoking your pizza license

          • Ungaba

            My daughter keeps telling me to watch Narcos. I’m not sure if I want it on my list or not. I have so damn many others to watch…

          • Randy

            Only two seasons tho. Not toooo long.

      • Andy PepPep

        Get knee surgery(ies) and a big ol’ bottle of hydrocodone and get to work!

        It’s what I did 2 years ago. Well worth it

        • UlfSammySon

          I was working as a bike messenger a few years back and was in an accident that left me with a couple broken bones in my face. Used the recovery time to watch all of Breaking Bad before the last season started. Plus, workman’s comp paid for everything and twice my salary for my time off.

    • lauriruu
  • Andy PepPep

    Sometimes I miss away messages from AIM.

    • PensPointsYourMom

      that’s frkin’ retro…do you miss the AOL login disc too?

  • PensPointsYourMom

    Dumo’s arbitration hearing is July 24.
    Sheary’s arbitration hearing is Aug. 4.
    Pagaeu signed for 3 years at an AAV of 3.1 per. (He’d be an interesting option for the pens at 3C, but I doubt we’d get him away from OTT).

  • PensPointsYourMom

    Here’s my current armchair GM hot take. Take Sheary to arbitration, sign him, and if its more than 3 mil, trade him for something else, picks, prospects, a package for a center, whatever. I might feel the same about Dumo, but the arbitration award would have to be north of 4.5

    • Jovi

      honestly, we Dumo more than we need Sheary, especially since The Snake came on the scene.

      Anyone fearful that Jake got lucky this year and next yr won’t be the same?

      • PensPointsYourMom

        I think Jake’s playoff performance will be difficult to repeat (i.e. he got a little lucky). I also think he’s a beast and will put up serious numbers for the bulk of his career. But 13G 21P and 5 GWG in 23 games is a lot to hope for as a “pace.”

        • Ungaba

          Yup, yup, yup.

          He’s got skillz and smartz, so I think those will stick around. But determining pace will be tough. I bet we’ll be better able to predict his 3rd year than his second, but it’s hard to say. Time will literally tell.

          I mean, not ‘literally’ literally, because how could it? Does time have access to a communication method and the ability to communicate? Of course not – don’t be stupid. Who would even suggest such a thing? Pssssh.

          • Jovi

            Chicken. No, egg. Umm, ok chicken. Dammit, EGG.

        • Jovi

          I look forward to see what he can do in a year. Also gotta see how durable he is. Injury bug caught up to Sheary this year. I hope Jake can stay healthy, but I would glad sell his kidneys for a health Letang.

          • Ungaba

            A healthy Letang would be neat-o, but I highly doubt it’s within the realm of the possible. I think a white walker grabs my nuts before Letang plays an 80 or 82 game season.

          • Jovi

            Could care less if he player 80-82, I just need him for everything after February.

          • Ungaba

            Fair ‘nouf

            But he’s talented enough to win the Norris if he can play a full season. Shame that he hasn’t yet.

          • Jovi

            I still think he can do it, he just has to be smarter in the corners. he may have to cheat a little. Maybe Reaves can be his linemate.
            Reverse Buffalo (you know who I mean)

          • PensPointsYourMom

            Reverse Buffalo is your mom’s favorite position.

          • Ungaba

            ABAM

          • Jovi
          • PensPointsYourMom

            it aint fairy dust that comes out…

          • Jovi

            oh god, too far. abort, abort!

          • lauriruu

            Fanny dust :S yeasty.

          • Ungaba

            Tinkerbell Bread?

          • lauriruu

            You should order some dragonglass or Valyrian steel online! Stay safe, Ung!

          • SouthSideGeno

            HE FREAKEN WOULD if the Pens weren’t over using him…they need someone who can share minutes with him to prolong his career.

    • Ungaba

      I really wonder who would want Sheary at that number. He strikes me as one of those guys that’s only valuable on certain teams. Look at the failed Brian Gibbons and Beautiful Bobby experiments as an example. Granted, he’s FAR better than those dudes, but is he as good as he was last year if he’s not on Sid’s wing? I think we all know that answer. So if he does get big dollars it may be tough to move him.

      Dumo is a different animal IMHO – he’s a quality ‘stay-at-homer’ with good enough wheels to NOT be Cardboard Orpik, v2. And I think he can play well with LeHair for a while longer. I’d keep him for 4.5 or under, definitely. Which is what you said, of course. 🙂

      • PensPointsYourMom

        But if its a choice between paying him 3.5, letting him go as a UFA or signing him and trading him for something. The last is the best. Some GM somewhere will want him, he’s won two cups and looks really good on paper, Tocchet is in ARZ now. Even for a third or second, he’s marketable. Though I suspect somebody will pay more than that.

        The bottom line is that, Sheary will get more than he’s worth in arbitration because his stats say so. Dumo will get less for the same reason.

        • PensPointsYourMom

          The tricky thing I keep thinking about Sheary is that he’s engaged to Sullivan’s niece or whatever. That shouldn’t mean the pens keep him no matter what. And that fact the was benched in the playoffs is a good sign, but nepotism does have a way of making things fucky.

          • Ungaba

            If nepotism makes things fucky… is that…. incest?

            Ew.

          • Jovi

            and in from left field, its UNGABA

          • Ungaba

            You obviously aren’t paying attention. I’m in from RIGHT field.

          • PensPointsYourMom

            ABAM

          • Jovi

            what does this mean? I tried looking it up once and it just gave me names of corporations.

          • Ungaba

            It’s VVVV.pens.hockey-ese. It’s valid on this site and nowhere else.

          • Jovi

            great, but what does it mean?

          • PensPointsYourMom

            so like I’d say “I ride your mom like that on the downhill”
            and Ung would say “ABAM”

          • Jovi

            thank you.
            now country of origin?

          • Ungaba

            VVVVV.pens.hockey, like I said!

            So… Fuckystan. Lower Fuckystan, really.

          • PensPointsYourMom

            its a mix of “amen” and “bam” like Emeril from back in the day, but ours from the 16 cup run.

          • Jovi

            got it. i must have missed the night it was created.

          • Randy

            Just his way of promoting the corp. that he happens to be director of marketing for. Company isn’t doing so well marketing wise tho.

          • Jovi

            If its Sully’s brother, less likely. If its a sister, well then, women tend to get there way.

            (ie, I have no clue about Sully’s family)

          • PensPointsYourMom

            I don’t know the details.

          • Ungaba

            Bostonians are weird, I can tell you that much.

      • Jovi

        I think something happen to Sheary towards the end of the year. I still think he’s good, but only at a certain price. I agree, he only works with certain players.

  • PensPointsYourMom

    $100 for a piece of game used glass? are you frking serious?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=30&v=lNnOC6aa5iI

    • Jovi

      LOL. I saw that too. It looks ugly and not even worth $10.

      • PensPointsYourMom

        Like the only way I’d pay for “game used” glass is if they promised me it had Nisky’s dried blood on it.

        • Jovi

          ummm, I think we can make this happen.
          partners?

          • Ungaba

            End convo or we’re all implicated.

          • Jovi

            abort, abort; get to the shredders!

    • SouthSideGeno

      It’s a charity though…jussayin

      • PensPointsYourMom

        Well like I could sell my belly button lint for charity (I have an “inny”) and I’d be a good dude, but it wouldn’t make the product desirable.

        • SouthSideGeno

          I sat next to Gloria Snokkers on my plane trip out here.
          I was on the aisle but I kept ‘”looking out the window” : )

        • Randy

          SSG bought one already

  • PensPointsYourMom
    • Ungaba

      Phuck the PG. No more freebies for Ung. Unless I wipe all my browsers and obderate the flanganoid and I don’t feel up to that today.

      Too tired from all that reverse buffalo last night.

      • It works if you use an incognito window

        • still dumb though

        • Ungaba

          Dude. That’s great – thanks!

          Now I can still read Mackey’s stuff. He’s good. Werner and Gentille are fun, but Mackey actually seems to know his shit.

        • SouthSideGeno

          Hmmph…did not know that. TY

      • Jovi

        same (minus the buffalo). it’s really lame.

    • Randy

      Looks like mommy and daddy had a lot of fun making the lemonade stand. When we were kids our parents didn’t give a shit about us and we had to steal lumber from nearby construction sites to build shitty little tree forts. Fuck that little privileged kid.

      • PensPointsYourMom

        #TheLemonadeIsntTheOnlyThingSour

        • Randy

          It’s true unless that kid is resourceful enough to hire Martha Stewart to make him a lemonade stand. Frk that kid.

  • SouthSideGeno

    You’ll be fine….you just need a good goat burger, xtra grease

  • Ungaba

    Crazy Topic Change Time!!!

    Can’t there be just one place, one country in Africa, that isn’t a complete shit-show?

    http://www.africanews.com/2017/07/17/baboon-hospitalized-after-causing-massive-power-cut-in-zambia/

    How is it that EVERY country in that freaking continent is a complete mess? It’s astonishing to me.

    Is it really all about access to water? Is it lack of natural resources? Even the ‘good’ countries that seem to have something going for them are still mostly frked. I just don’t get it.

    • Jovi

      Good question. i’m sure a lot of crap can going into why Africa is so crazy.
      Greed, lack of resources, too many different cultures/languages with no ability to work together, isolation, imperialism…lions.

    • Penguin in Houston

      Corrupt government officials

      • Randy

        Spent a lot of time there (east Africa), primarily Tanzania, and you’re right. It’s about 1% of the population that takes advantage of the rest through the government. I never really saw many white people, and if they were there, either tourists or lending a helping hand. There maybe some hotspots where foreigners run businesses and take advantage of people, but I didn’t really go to those areas (like Nairobi). I stayed at the house of an aristocrat in a suburb of Nairobi and it was a weird experience. Their kids were cool, but I could tell they were growing up to be sheltered little assholes that have servants and whatnot.

    • lauriruu

      I LOVE ‘AFRICA’

      https://youtu.be/FTQbiNvZqaY

    • Jovi

      What is deadlier, Africa or Australia ?
      Or
      You are lost in Africa or Australia; How long do you last and what will you die of?

      Ex:
      15 days in Africa; death by Pirate
      40 days in Australia; death by spider

      • lauriruu

        Do you mean ‘Pirate’ as in baseball?

        • Jovi
          • Jovi

            Fin, did you used to live in the US or have you just learn all the Pitt talk from yinz peeps?

          • lauriruu

            Twitter is horrible during the summer. It’s all Pirates/Buccaneers this and that. Erreyday. 162 games per season. INSUFFERABLE. Bring back hawkey plz.

          • SouthSideGeno

            I must say, I have always admired your English language skill. It is (sadly for us) better than most Americans.

          • Jovi

            speak for yourself, my English rocks.

          • SouthSideGeno

            Hahaha…I wasn’t even thinking of you…are you feeling self conscious?

          • Jovi

            No 🙁
            I’m awesome. AWESOME, I tell you.

          • SouthSideGeno

            I know you are ; )

          • lauriruu

            *self-conscious

          • SouthSideGeno

            Seeeeee wut eye mean..hahaha

          • lauriruu

            Oh stahp it you.

          • SouthSideGeno

            Seriously. You are a Finnish Super Genius

          • lauriruu

            I agree that I am Finnish.

          • SouthSideGeno

            …and humble too!

          • Jovi

            SSG, anyway to put Towes’ face in here and save it for Novemeber?

          • SouthSideGeno

            Goooood Idea ; )

          • UlfSammySon

            You’re coming, then?

          • Jovi

            I’m gonna try…maximum effort

          • Jovi

            if I do, it will be all last minute. I’m a poor planner.

          • SouthSideGeno

            Maximum effort to come?

          • Jovi

            Si

          • SouthSideGeno

            *higher, faster, lower, slower.

          • Jovi
          • lauriruu

            HIGH FIN!

          • lauriruu

            So do you mean a pirate rather than a Pirate? Why would one of the Pirates kill you in Africa? Now that’s a mystery.

          • Jovi

            Somalian pirates. I agree its a very special area and death, but its a thing.
            death by lion is too easy.

          • Randy

            If you’re murican, cunadian, or finished, They have no interest in killing you, just fetching a ransom from the consulate. It’s big business.

          • Randy

            I heard the pirates have head offices in Sudan and South Africa. They wouldn’t kill you because your ransom is worth too much. They’ll take good care of you. Unless you’re Ethiopian. At least when I was there, I was told Ethiopians will be decapitated on site.

          • PensPointsYourMom

            pfft…the pirates head office trades all the best pirate talent for peanuts so the organization can never flourish.

    • SouthSideGeno

      Too much foreign (read as white devil) interference for the past two centuries. Lack of educational system for indigenous peoples.

  • Jovi

    SSG has landed. Guess you got passed the drug dogs.

    • SouthSideGeno

      I shared with them….travel sekret!

  • Penguin in Houston
    • SouthSideGeno

      Soo funny…I have been looking for a good boat for a skiing theme…you beat me to it.

  • Penguin in Houston
    • Jovi

      LOL.
      Everyone pour one out for Justin’s liver

    • Midnight Rider

      I think he can upgrade from Bud Light after that new contract.

      • PensPointsYourMom

        pretty sure someone ‘shopped those beers in.

        • Midnight Rider

          I would flip the Cup upside down, take the bottom off, and fill it that way. Why has no one done that yet?

          • Midnight Rider

            Also Schultz looks like Gollum with that pose (if you feel like shopping tonight).

          • Midnight Rider

            Or replace the Bud Lights with the Scultz parade pic…

          • SouthSideGeno

            I’m pretty sure Mario did. He just doan make a deal of it.

        • SouthSideGeno

          Sooo…originally Beaver Water?

  • Randy

    So um geno, did you get any pics of uh out the window while you were sitting beside Gloria Snokers?

  • Jovi
    • lauriruu

      *wolf whistles

      • SouthSideGeno

        Ruski Bluehair Cougar Hunter

    • Randy

      Finally the Gloria Snokers I was waiting for!

      • PensPointsYourMom

        I wonder if the carpet matches the drapes (psst…I mean his dad.)

        • Randy

          Answer: Airstrip dyed jet black, and yes. It’s hot.

  • Broken Coach Vlad

    Pheasants!

    • Jovi

      Who ya calling Peasant!

      • Broken Coach Vlad

        lol.. term of endearment..

    • Randy

      Doan start with the name calling again.

  • PensPointsYourMom
    • SouthSideGeno

      Sooo good…sooo wrong

    • Jovi

      AHHHHHHHHHH.
      My Nightmares!

    • Jovi

      too good.

    • Midnight Rider

      You’re a goddamned hero. This is fantastic! Thank you.

  • PensPointsYourMom

    So Sam Adams is sampling ODB for their summer beer commercials? Cause that’s a connection that seems natural, and rational, to me.

    • SouthSideGeno

      Well…it’s no worse than Ty Cobb representing ‘Glorious Leader’

      • PensPointsYourMom

        are you Ore-gone yet?

        • SouthSideGeno

          So Gone….been up for 32 hours and not tired yet…this shit totally works

          • Midnight Rider

            Sativa? Beaver Water? Both?

          • SouthSideGeno

            Yes

  • PensPointsYourMom

    Whomever is in charge of the “Left and Right Twix” ad campaign should be chemically castrated.

    • SouthSideGeno

      hahaha…and WHY do they keep trying to bring back Puppy/Monkey/Baby….vomit

      • Jovi

        What about those awful Old Spice commercial with the 2 old-er ladies

        • PensPointsYourMom

          I dont think I’ve seen those.

          • Jovi

            What! Its all over the tv. They talk about how commercials have become too weird and then something weird happens.

  • Jovi

    Just watched Suicide squad. Ummm, glad I got it for free. Not sure of the point of the movie per se, but I liked the music.

    • PensPointsYourMom

      that movie was hot garbage. It was beneath Will Smith, which I thought before watching it, was an impossibility.

      • Jovi

        Jared made a big stink about how he was cut out of the movie. I wish they cut more out, he was terrible.
        And why did the alligator guy remind me of Jamie Fox character from Spiderman? Was it Jamie or just a rip off?
        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/73afc7f5f7059b9db345a384885a51ef7465b0bd6fc8b9407212fc091482e4c8.jpg

        • Jovi

          just checked. its not him; not sure if I should be offended. though, i guess i’m like 5 months too late.

          • PensPointsYourMom

            there are so many things to hate about that movie…pick your top 3 and call it day.

    • lauriruu

      I am still regretting that I paid money to see that film.

  • Jovi
  • PensPointsYourMom

    I’d be taking a long hard look at Brandon Pirri. He’ll be cheap and could fill a 4C role. His PDO has been terrible over the last 3 seasons (low 90s) and he was a 20 goal scorer, once. Plus he did pretty well at FO last season. Its not that kind of signing that will get anyone excited, but it would be a decent depth move, and he can slide over to wing if need be, or eat nachos.

    • Broken Coach Vlad

      now I want nachos…..