Recap 68: !@#^&#$%&!@#*!!

Jimmers is the fookin best. Full stop.

Big Ben night…please. Get the Stillers to suck his Roethlisweiner. Get yer pig hand off my shaft rubber.

Puck drops…Fuck Kreider and his whores Zibanajihad and Breadstick. Has any team ever skoared 3 hat tricks in one game?  WE should do that sometime.

This game is back & forth, they’re feeling us out…we’re rubbing up agaist them…ew. 5 minutes of flacid so far.

Rangers skoar lots of goals and so do we…but both teams are playing the D pretty tight tonight. Crowd is into this game early. It’s something I’m not used to of late. Big Ben is hanging out in Mario’s box…errrybuddy is excitement!

Half a period gone and still a completely even game. Rags might have a slight edge in O zone possession. HEINY HITS THE POST. Great set up from BJC. Chryst I love that guy’s old-man game…Rust fails twice…Pens are picking it up, lot’s more chances with 7 minutes to go.

Ppeeddeerrssoonn with a clear shot to the goal with traffic in front…he dishes to the half wall…WUT THE FUK??? I hate that mentality. Take the shot when it presents.

DUMO TO BOYLE ARE THE HEROS WE DESERVE

Boyle (9) from Dumoulin (14), Letang (50) – 14:24 – EV

1-0 PENS …another great play including Blueger and Zahorna as well.

Pens are all over the Rags with under 4 minutes to go. Boyle Bluger Zahorna line is mainlining wolveriene adrenaline tonight!

Great 1st period for the Pens. Starting adagio, building to a strong cresendo…molto bene Penguinos!

No penalties in the 1st…I’m waiting for a Ranger to pull a knife on Sid or Geno. “South Side Story?”

JAR-E looks sharp…NO REBOUNDS and a good D-box in front of him. I can abide. In “R” player news…Rusty is so talented …Rodriguez is a total enigma…Rakell is playing, I think.

10 minute mark and the Ref checkes his whistle…it works…Penguins pull out their big ole PP. Aaaaaaaand…nothing.

Pens are actually playing well against the Rags tonight. However, they’ve had 4 odd man rushes and nothing to show for it. That only spells … Vetrano of course, from Zibzeb-Jihad… 1-1.

4 minutes left …Pens need to take the lead into the terd.  And then of course some Braden Schniderguy  get’s his 2nd gola of his career. Pens love to bring young talent along…too bad it’s mostly always guys on other teams. 2-1 baddies. Shit.

Little bit of shenanegans at the end of the period…hopefully it’ll get the Pens going for DA TERD!

DA TERD…. OWN IT

Alright. Get mean. “Shoot the puck deep and work their D hard” …thanks Jay 😀

WE need to get one early and then a few after that…only 13 total shots through the 1st 2 periods. Pens need to have a “shot management and shoot first mentality” team meeting. So much talent so little desire to ‘SHOO DA PUK.’

Pens start the terd a man short because… “2nd period shenanigans” …who knew? Of course Kreider skoars his 3,000th gola of the week. 3-1 Rags…SONOFABITH

Rusty draws a trip ..Pens PP flops out at the 14:58 minute mark…fingers crossed. Very little fire on the PP from the Pens. Still 3-1 Rags.

12 minutes to skoar 2. Rust is everywhere tonight…butt no happy ending, yet. JOVI, suit up!

Rudeweasle gets absolutely murdered on a trip and WE get what may be our final chance to turn this turd barge around. 10 minutes left…GET ONE!

AND … OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN!

Crosby (25) from Malkin (17), Letang (51) – 10:37 – PPG

Sid shows em how it’s done…rocket slapper from the blue line and abrakadabra, 3-2 and WE’re back in the game. Pens are energized by Seed’s gola… the 4th line is going coocoo for coco pufs. We’re so doing this.

6 minutes 6 seconds left…wait…6, 6?  WE’RE TOTALLY DOIN THIS. Except that WE can’t get any O zone pressure, even after that 87 gola.

3:20 left….kamon bois. Rags are all over us. They have a very tight checking game. Time to stab somebuddy…instead WE pull JAR-E.

Less that 2 minutes…RAKELL SAVES…absolute CIRCUS SIDE SHOW FINAL MINUTE…butt no happy ending. fuk

GAME

Thoughts:

  • The boys wanted this one… but not bad enough.
  • Jarry is still superlative in net.
  • Boyle continuing to Do Good Things
  • One PPG against was the difference
  • Oh, and Sid is kind of amazing, always…
Would need 3 more seasons at that rate. Would YOU bet against him?