Screw(ge)d Again – Just in time for Xmas!!!

He just looks like he has bad breath.

I’m not going to take a lot of time to investigate all of this, but suffice it to say, the League and the owners, collectively, are looking to take the players to pound town via their collective Hershey highways.

(I tried to embed it, but I’m apparently a moron. I know – I was just as shocked as you)

Thanks Ung

To summarize: players defer some salary because reasons. The current agreement means those reasons only guarantee each player 72% of their salary. Yes, they could get more somehow, but I don’t know how and I don’t care to research it. The point is, the players agreed to this.

To the surprise of zero people, ownership is worried about revenues for the coming season. When I last checked my notes, they didn’t say anything about being worried about YOUR revenues, but they’re millionaires and billionaires and they have more important things to be doing.

Anyway, they’re worried, so what do they want? They want the players to make up for the shortfall, in the form of only guaranteeing 55.5% of their salaries. Because who wouldn’t want to take a massive pay cut, amirite?

Astonishingly, the scum sucking, money grubbing, jerkfaced players aren’t super excited about this deal, especially since it seems more and more likely that the coming season will only be 48 games anyway.

(This time I investigated why I couldn’t embed. Not my fault! Blame WordPress. Or Disqus, I don’t care which, just not me!)

So what have we learned? That, regardless of who gets screwed less – the owners or the players – WE fans will get screwed precisely the same amount. Probably more. Actually, definitely more. What will we do about it? Probably run out and buy this jersey:

I’m still not sure about this one, but I like it more each time I see it.

The silver lining? There will be hockey again (probably). Also, Jack Johnson is gone. So there’s that. But Grampy Jim replaced him with Codi Ceci.

I need more bourbon…

And oh yeah, Happy Thanksgiving. Somewhere in the desert, Phil Kessel is sitting down to this.